CHIBATRON

Today I have decided to exert my weekly pedantic rant on a topic that greatly perturbs me. The formality of my childhood was most greatly caused by the overabundance of cocktail parties and wine tastings my parents dragged me to throughout my early years. Each monotonous party, although inhabited by a variety of guests from a plethora of countries, always led the conversation down the same bottleneck of a boring thematic conclusion. The decline of American society. I, myself, generally removed three generations from the average guest of the soiree, was always disconcerted by this such topic. All the middle-aged men and women seemed confident that they themselves had lived through the pinnacle of American society, enjoying all the benefits of a bustling economy, without any of the blunders. They would continue, to assert that each generation thereafter was a slow yet exponential decline of societal morals, productivity, and potential. Feeding their arguments with examples such as the growing rap epidemic, the shortening jean skirt, and the social-networking obsession, these people who surrounded me were unwavering in their belief that civilization and humanity as a whole was dwindling down a depressing path. Naturally, my thoughts of repulsion quickly took control of my juvenile mind as every issue these elders emotionally voiced seemed hypocritical and conceited. They had convinced themselves that they were the pinnacle of civilization, the cream of the crop, the top of the mountain, and no others would live up to what they had accomplished. Furthermore, to them, it was as if the sixties had never transpired, LSD had never flown freely among their youthful years, and hippies were a figment of their imagination. Early on, I discerned such negativity expressed towards my happy, peace-loving, recycling-savvy generation as jealousy. Jealousy that they couldn’t watch hours of free pornography on high resolution computer screens. Jealousy that they didn’t have pump-up sneakers. Jealousy that they didn’t have marshmallows in their cereal. Most of all, jealousy that they truly did not have too much fun. To conclude my seemingly endless rant, my general point, my eternal belief, is that my generation, the new generation, is the best, and by no means is declining, rather it is slowly trekking the perpetual incline to societal greatness. Posted below is an image to prove exactly what I have so eloquently defended, visual verification that my generation is not a degenerate one, confirmation that we still abide by our ancient societal standards and morals.